Thursday, April 14, 2011

Don't play with fire

the coat before the burn.

Don't play with fire, and don't stand too close to a heater.  I'm sure everyone is tired of hearing how much I hate the cold.  At this point, I probably don't need to go into more details about how the cold completely debilitates every limb and turns me into a icicle-covered slug.  However, my solutions to warming up are not always the most advised.  For example, once when camping in the hill country with Leslie and Jen (my lovely friend soul mates from high school) I tried to warm my feet by the fire.  It was summer, and in Texas, that means generally it is hot, however, even in Texas, by night time, the air cools down quite a bit, and my feet are the first things to get cold. I believe I had put socks on, however, for some reason, I had kept my flip flops on.  (Note to readers: do not do this)  Why would wearing flip flops next to a fire be such a bad idea?  Fire melts rubber or plastic or whatever Old Navy flip flops are made from.  The fire melted the bottom  so much that the thong broke, and the shoes were never again wearable.
In Chile, I was so cold, I made an unconscious effort to gain weight.  You read correctly. I was so cold, I ate more; more than I normally would in an effort to protect my body from the gelid temperatures.  I did not like the results in the summer time.
And in Korea, what did I do? I stood too close to the heater.  In the auditorium, there is no central heating, but instead a large industrial heater was responsible for warming the room. I couldn't get warm enough, so I slowly inched closer and closer to the heater, while still wearing my large insulated coat. I didn't even notice the huge burn mark until after the ceremony had concluded. I didn't notice the huge brown blotch on my jacket I purchased in Italy in 2005.  I continued to wear it throughout the winter season, even with the unseemly blotch, but I even my cheapness has its limits.  I will miss that jacket.  We had fun times together.

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